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Random encounters

August 3, 2008

I’ve been a bit delinquent in my posting lately, which is a pity since there’s so much going on.

First, some fun random encounters we’ve had in the past week or two. At the Poughkeepsie Galleria, as we entered through the Target, someone called out, “Are you gay?” Looking back, we saw five or six people of all different ages, genders and races sitting on or around a bench. The voice sounded like a guy, but that’s about as far as we got, so we just called out “Yep!” and kept walking.

The voice wasn’t particularly threatening, but it did make my heart beat faster, since the follow-up to questions like that is so often volatile. I was particularly intrigued because we weren’t holding hands or doing anything especially couple-y. I’ve been told that we’re very obviously a couple, even when we’re not touching or talking to each other, but we’ve also been asked if we were brothers, even after we had spent all night holding hands and giving each other the occasional peck. A dumb question from an otherwise intelligent person!

On my lunch break we walked hand-in-hand down the street in Allentown, N.J. (a small town with a Main Street that’s nothing like the nearby Allentown, Pa.), and noticed a car honking for no apparent reason. I thought it was kind of strange, especially when another car did the same thing. We looked toward the street to see what the big deal was and saw a teenage girl looking at us and excitedly mouthing something. With the window closed, we couldn’t tell what she said, but it looked like something along the lines of “Oh my god that’s so cute!” It was nice (at least going by that interpretation of events), but kind of bewildering. Usually it’s my female coworkers who get honked at!

In other news, we can get married in Massachusetts now, despite being from out-of-state, and it would even stay good in New York! That’s the most likely option on the table right now for when we decide to get married (which we’ve discussed). For some reason, New Jersey leaders don’t think people here will jump ship.

Steven Goldstein, chairman of Garden State Equality, does not expect droves of same-sex couples to board the Metroliner to Boston to apply for marriage licenses.

“Right now there’s no rush at all to any jurisdiction, including Massachusetts,” Goldstein said.

One reason is legal. When same-sex couples who wed in other states return to New Jersey, the state will not recognize them as being married. Instead, it will regard them as partners in a civil union — a status they have been able to create in New Jersey since February 2007.

Of course, he doesn’t mention the fact that while Massachusetts marriages will turn into New Jerseyan civil unions, it doesn’t work the other way around, and a civil union is useless in most other places. (They also don’t mean all that much around here.) Furthermore, people are leaving New Jersey in record numbers (PDF), and from the looks of it, everyone under 30 is moving to New York anyway. So why would I give my money to a state nobody wants to be in that affords us second-class citizenship?

2 Comments leave one →
  1. confessionsofaclosetcase permalink
    August 4, 2008 12:55 am

    hey, your blog is interesting! can i link you?


  2. confessionsofaclosetcase permalink
    August 4, 2008 10:25 pm

    hey there again. your reply was quite insightful. about sexuality as a spectrum. now it starts to make sense. hahaha. cool.


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